Nobody needs to find their passion.

Not at all. No more pressure. Relax. Finding your passion is useless.

I’ve been pushing myself hard in the past few years trying to really 'find my passion'. I enjoyed my studies and I like what I do for a living but I always thought that there is something special I should be doing on the side. Something that makes me super excited and proud. Something I can be great at. I often discovered things that I like and this was followed by either one of the two scenarios:

1. This is exciting but it is too hard. I have no experience or even basic knowledge. I can't leave the stuff that I'm already 'deep into' to start from scratch. I am already 23.

📷

2. This is exciting. LET'S DO THIS! That's my passion now!

📷

I won't comment much on the first scenario immediately, I know how many people older than me would wisely laugh at this. The main purpose of this blog will give an idea of my realization and further thoughts on this behaviour and way of thinking.

In terms of number two, yes, brave girl is going to get it but... shortly after she gets bored.

And disappointed with myself. I start accusing myself in a lack of persistence, in not being good enough, in being lazy. I mentally punish myself at the first attempt of life to defeat me. However, I work hard. I really do. My priorities just change all the time.

When I started my blog I was so excited. (June, 2017 - still available here) I was enjoying doing it so much, writing and sharing my thoughts that I wouldn’t even realize I had, reshaping everything I learned and read, getting more involved with the human mind...

📷

But then I got too busy (last year at uni, 2 part-time jobs, society to lead, mentoring + some more excuses), there wasn’t enough time for it, and in order to do it I had to sacrifice an hour or two from my 5 hour daily sleep. It became a choir. A non pleasurable activity. A non priority. As much as I used to love it, my unconscious brain associated it with too much physical and mental effort thus convinced me that I wasn’t passionate about it anymore.

However, once those other ‘priorities’ were completed I felt empty. Something was missing from my life and that was writing. But I already failed that one... I already gave up. Shut down my blog. Disappointed the few loyal readers I had. I need to find a new passion now.

Bs, Maria. Start over.

Until only recently I realized that looking for my passion is so not worth it. However, being passionate about what I am currently doing is invaluable. 

Here’s the thing. It is not easy. Not at all. I believe that you might absolutely hate your job, your studies whatever, and you do not believe it is possible to even slightly enjoy it. However, in most cases that's untrue. It is as simple as defining why you're doing whatever that is, and sticking to that why as an anchor point whenever it 'hits you'. The more negative emotions are eliminated the more positive energy there is to produce PHYSICAL energy for you to also do your side thing... 'passion'.

Simple example: You work at Starbucks and you hate it. You want to be a photographer.

Why do you work there? To survive? Well done, you're alive.

Now, just find one simple thing if not more to enjoy on a daily basis. The coffee smell. The little convos. The comfort of your new shoes. The laughter of your collegaue.

One.

Stick to this. Then once you're free DO YOUR THING. Utilize your lunch break doing research or engaging with people on Instagram to grow your brand. Look for inspiration. Reach out to influencers. Go shoot for 5 minutes if that's all you can afford BUT do it EVERY DAY, and if you skip a day, or two, or a week DON'T PUNISH YOURSELF mentally. Just start over. Your passion still lives within you.

There is also a possibility that you are doing something that you expect to bring you benefits in the long run - diploma, course completion, junior job role, health and fitness journey - but you don’t exactly enjoy it. It’s a choir. It’s a ‘have to do’ and not ‘excited to be doing’. Again - stick to the why and make all the possible EFFORT to enjoy the journey. I believe that if you can't do that, you will very likely won't be able to enjoy your arrival at the end destination and possibly have to start looking for a new 'passion'.

As much the first scenario is hard to change so is the second. But the change lays at the exact same place in both situations. Your mind.

Not a cliche, trust me. Been there, done that. (and still back and forth)

Ok so let’s come back to the definition of passion.

In our society we have this idea that there should be this one thing that we absolutely loved doing since early childhood. The stronger your passion for it is, the better you’ll become in it. The more successful you would be one day. Right?

We associate this idea with big achievers/role models such as Mozart, Tiger Woods and many many more.

At the age of 6, Mozart already impressed the aristocracy with his own peaces of music, and stacked up a good number of highly valued music compsitions by the age of 10.

The story told by journalist Geoff Colvin and adopted from Bounce (Syed, 2010): Mozart's father was Leopold Mozart - famous composer and performer. He was also a domineering parent who started his son on an intensive training in composition at the age of three. Important factor was that Leopold was also deep into the science behind how music is taught to children which made him a highly accomplished pedagoue. He published a book before his son was born. As soon as Wolfgang came to live he started receiving heavy instructions from an absolute expert on a daily basis. Mozart's first MASTERPIECE was created when he was 21 years old. Awesome, right. The facts, though, are that by this time he spent 18 years of extremely hard expert training.

Born with a passion? Born with natural talent? I don't think so.

📷

Another one. 'The most naturally gifted golfer to play the game' as defined by experts, Tiger Woods.

Earl Woods was a former baseball player obsessed with the idea that practice makes greatness. He started training his son at what he himself describes as 'unthinkably early age' before he could even walk or talk. Placed in his highchair in the garage at his house, Tiger was watching his dad hitting balls into the net, and was given a golf stick before his first birthday. He also knew a par 5 from a par 4 before even being able to count that far. At the age of two, Tiger entered his first tournament. At 4 he was trained by a professional on a daily basis and at 14 he won his first national major tournament. By his mid-teens, Woods had passed the ten thousand hours of dedicated practice, just like Mozart.

But let’s look closer into these individual’s passions... 

So you see either they chose to be ‘passionate’ about their craft or somebody chose it for them. More importantly their involvement, their hard work and them showing up were the cues for both their success and passion evolvements.

So what now? Shall we blame our parents for not pushing us enough in getting involved in football, maths or drama from early age? Shall we blame ourselves for not staying committed to the things we found interesting when we were younger.

Neither.

Do it now.

Jeff Bezos had a career in computer science on Wall Street and worked at various financial firms before casually deciding to make a website and call it Amazon at 31.

Vera Wang was a figure skater and journalist before entering the fashion industry at age 40. And now...

Arnold Schwarzenegger first moved from world champion bodybuilder in his 20s to award-winning actor in his 30s, then he became the Governor of California in 2003 at 56.

Happens. And it's ok.

Passion initiates with choice, sustains with ‘doing the hard things until they’re easy’, and turns into success when one learns to enjoy the process rather than solely focus on the end goal.

At least that’s how I see it... And it is also how I’d like to see it. I mean, think about it - if you do it this way, you would be continuously satisfied with yourself, you wouldn’t die without trying, you will stop the negative self talk, sabotage and blaming once and forever. You will have fun living. It won’t be about the destination but the overall journey as cliche as it sounds.

Life must be a passion.

I am passionate about living.

and writing

I AM BACK ;)

📷